Daily Prompt: Bespoke


Lately, I’ve been melancholy.
I didn’t understand what the word meant.
My first thought,something sad and lonely.

Then, I looked it up:

essentially, bespoke is the past tense for bespeak.
The appearance of something can suggest or be evidence.
Something made to order, like clothes…

I though about my wedding dress.

It wasn’t made to order.
In fact, I found it at a second hand boutique shop.
My price range,
a beautiful dress.

The dress was too big at first,
but a tailor can do amazing things.
It fit me perfectly.

I’m rambling now.

The truth is
our first thoughts on a subject are often clouded
by the worry, anxiety and fears of our day, but,
the second thoughts should be glimmering…

with hope, joy, love.


via Daily Prompt: Bespoke


My Very Own Writing Space


Tonight will mark our first week in this trailer.
I can’t say how happy I am to have our own little space.
There is a place for everything.
We can live simply and be content with what we have.

Travis set up a desk in the bunk room for me.
I’m typing here as we speak.
I don’t have the little window open yet.
My face is all greasy from sleep.
I’m savoring this peaceful morning.

It has been a long time since I had a little spot to write.

I feel so ready for Camp NaNoWriMo.
It starts next Friday on July 1st.

I haven’t really done much preparation.
I’m actually kind of on the fence about “pantsing” or “planning.”
I’ve won planning my project and I have won with no preparation.
I have also failed doing both.

When I have a special place to write I usually achieve my goals.
This is probably just a mindset I need to change, but at least it’s a pattern I am finally noticing!

I will be posting every week to update on my progress.
The plan is this will keep me accountable to my writing goals!

What have you discovered is best for your writing space? Do you find it easier to have a spot at home to write, or do you like going wherever the wind takes you? 


Rock Scrambling

We have been on the rental search for a long time.
You may have read my article about housing on the central coast.
It is only getting worse.

For those of you who know me personally, you’re probably wondering why we’ve made so many trips to the desert lately.

It’s really strange, but I think I’ve fallen in love.

We went out there for fun, to see if I might like it.

It’s beautiful.
There are long stretches of nothing.
Then, you see these huge rolling black mountains.
Rocks piled one on top of the other in a chaotic and perfect way.

Travis took me to the Indian Cove campground on our first trip.
We drove around looking at the camping spaces for a while.
I made him stop at a particularly wonderful clump of desert flowers that I liked.

He spent summers vacationing in Joshua Tree with his family.
They camped, climbed the rocks and hiked.
My family didn’t do anything like that.

“Lets climb that pile of rocks,” he said.

I looked at where he was pointing and my mouth just dropped.
I hadn’t even considered climbing these gigantic boulders!

I watched him scramble up the rocks.
Soon, I was hopping up after him.
I don’t even know when I decided to do it.

I had to stop several times.
I stared down at our little Toyota Camry that was growing smaller and smaller in the distance and breathed deeply.

I kept going.

We made it to the very top of that pile of rocks.
We could have kept going, but my legs had turned to jelly.

I couldn’t stand up at the top.
I had to crouch on my knees smiling like an idiot.
How exhilarating!






You Don’t Wanna See Me Angry


I am a very positive person.
I love to be cheerful. To make the people around me happy.

Even the happiest person can get angry.

I feel this heavy anger bubbling up inside of me.
Everything irritates me. Everything!
I can’t stand it!

I call it “hangry.”
If I get too hungry, then my normal bubbly personality is overshadowed by this little, angry woman. I feel like an old grandma who has just had enough!

The lesson of this story…
Pay attention to yourself! Take care of your own basic needs so that you don’t accidentally lash out at those around you!




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Who’s Afraid of the Big Blank Page?


There are times when I just can’t bring myself to write, but when I do, a little bit every day, that is when the magic starts to happen. It’s gradual really.

The more I give myself over to the words in my head, to be creative in whatever outlet I feel comfortable with, the more I am truly able to enjoy the process.

There will be times when I stare at the blank computer screen or the blank page in my notebook and I do feel blocked.

I’ve noticed that when I’m plagued by these bouts of unease, it’s because I am thinking way too hard and letting my inner critic get the best of me before I have even started putting my pen to paper. It’s awful isn’t it? Have you ever felt that way and given up on your good ideas?

A war is raging constantly. It is a battle inside against the self-doubt, the embarrassment and the negative ideas that pop up and leave me reeling. I love to write, but, am I good enough? What will people think? Is it too dark? Is it too joyful? What am I doing!

If you have every been tormented by your own negative thoughts, then you need to be reminded of this: You are lovely. You are enough. You matter.

Since I have made it a constant in my life, I feel more energized. My thoughts and ideas are more organized and I am so passionate about my projects. It is so easy to let your inner critic suffocate your creativity, so I have created a simple, battle plan, so to speak when it comes to my own personal irritant (myself)!

Just keep writing. Write, every single day.

Your words don’t have to be magic, but you do need to keep writing. If you stop for even one day, you are permitting the starved vultures of doubt to swirl around your budding idea or work in progress. You don’t even have to focus on your critical stories and ideas every day, but just make it a point to sit down and write.

What activities or exercises help you to keep writing? What works for you?




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The Human Saga


Normal is different for everyone. No two people will have the same view of what is usual, typical, expected. We all have different backgrounds, values and influences. That is why there is so much diversity in the world. It’s a good thing. We were created to be individuals with different personalities and the power to choose.

Sometimes, it just hits me. The fact that every single person you see is their own person. We know this right? Of course we know this, but doesn’t it ever just sneak up on you? The idea that they are having their own tumultuous thoughts, just like you?

You might be worried about your housing situation, what you are going to cook for dinner, the bills that are stacking up on your desk at home. The person who annoys you as you drive to work on the freeway might be afraid for their loved one who is living in a war torn country, or they are wondering how to afford their next meal. Maybe it isn’t as drastic as that, but when you take a moment to understand the complexity of this very simple aspect. Doesn’t it just amaze you?

We are all connected. We are affected by the bad things that happen in the world. The sadness of losing a loved one in death, the joy of a new baby in the family, the excitement of making new friends. We are people. As individuals we may feel very alone at times, but we are all connected by the most simple truth. We are human.

My favorite novels consist of a saga, a book about generations of people in a family or those who hold a mystery in their hearts and are all connected in some way. Life, is like this. You may not ever realize how many people you effect in life, but they will. Do you want to be the person who gave them strength to keep enduring? I do!




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The Happy Habit – Be Healthy


What is being healthy? It would be different for every person. For me, it’s feel good on the inside and the rest will follow. I like to make the people around me feel happy, excited and relaxed. There are too many things in this world that are poised to make us miserable for me to be another negative.

Back when I was working nights at the nursing home I was a caffeine addict. I drank red bulls and coffee at least 4 nights a week. It became a habit, and a nasty one at that! Since changing my “day job” I haven’t had an energy drink in almost 9 months! I have made it a goal to drink at least 8 glasses of water in a day. I’ve discovered that keeping my body hydrated allows me to be the positive, bubbly person that I want to be.

It can be hard when there’s coffee and soda and so many yummy drinks to choose from, but I save those things for a treat. I still drink a cup of coffee everyday, but it’s never like I will crumble if I don’t have it. Water though, that’s a necessity.

Water is the main body-wise health thing that I worry about. The most important aspect of myself that no one sees, is my mindset. I could drink as much water as I want, but if I’m focusing on negative ideas, problems and issues too much, then I’m still not going to be at my best health wise.

Mindset if everything. Stay positive despite what the circumstances of this world throws at you. Help others as much as you can. It’s the little things that help the most! The unexpected flower on someone’s desk, the tray of goodies brought into work for sharing, the personal interest shown to a friend or a stranger.

Truthfully, my circumstances will always be changing. I can’t control the weather, the financial world, the type of roof over my head. I can control how I treat others and that makes me feel great!




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